You have to read this if you are 35 and alone!
It does not matter how you got to be alone in your mid-thirties. What is important, however, is that you have a number of priorities in order so that you can protect yourself and your date which possible getting hurt. There are too many reasons to list on the reasons why you are on the market at this stage of your life, but you must be clear about your goals, both long and short term. You do not want to be conducted on or trapped into something that you do not want in the first place.
The first things you need to consider are your short - and long-term relations objectives. If you are a confirmed bachelor (or bachlorette) certainly you do not want to be dating someone who is determined to settle down and start a family. The age is often linked to that too. A twenty-something may be looking for a good time or air. While dating some one younger can be fun, for the short time, if you are looking for a serious relationship, you may want to look elsewhere.
There are many things to take into account when dealing either above or below your age. If you get someone who is much younger, you may get hurt because they can lack of maturity that comes only from life experience. Twenty generation, are often still trying to figure out where they fit in, and are still build up their aim. The other concern is the children, or they possibly not wanting any children. If you are really serious, as in any age group, you need to discuss views on children.
On the other hand if you choose someone with more age than you, there is still a problem as well. They usually already choose what they want out of life, and, in general, are not too excited to change course. If you really want to settle down, do not go running after the man or woman who has no intention of a long-term relationship. Also, there are some generation gaps that must be taken into account. Your older lover may not appreciate your going to see rock band in concert. But understanding to each other you can face any obstacles between you two.
Another thing to consider is your financial situation. Have you spent the last ten years to get ahead in your career and the rewards that come with that? Are you ready to give up half of your money in a divorce? You will have to decide what is important in terms of the person you are dating. Even people who are not married have had their lover runoff with the bank account. Protect yourself and, if necessary, seek the advice of a lawyer before proposing or accepting a proposal.
Finally, if you have children, you need to consider the type of people who come into your life. Do you want to make any and all of your time to respond, or are you going to wait for someone fairly serious? You also have to try to defend the values you want your children to follow in their lives. You are a model, and how you would conduct no impression on your children.
In short, be smart about what you are doing. Do not let yourself be open to be taken advantage of. More than anything else, however, have fun and good luck in your romantic efforts.
